Life in the Garden

Matters of Life and Death

Memorial Service Ideas

Spirit of Giving

Greetings!

Three Beautiful Things:

Fat juicy worms
The gift of life
Tacos and Bloody Marys

The Spring clean up continues, we’ve been yanking shrubs, pulling weeds and marveling at the size of the worms. A decision has been made to nix the vegetable garden this year and consolidate some of the random beds through out the yard. Last year we said No New Projects, just manage what we’ve got. This year, we’re reigning it in.
In a recent post we touched on “the gift of life” and I was reminded of a customer who shared her story of how her husband’s death saved the lives of 59 people. She says,

“Chuck’s life had been a shining star to so many and as a family we wanted his giving spirit to continue. What greater way to honor, pay tribute to, and to memorialize a loved one than to give a future to someone else.”This lady was able to meet the man who received her husband’s liver.”Jim had been waiting on an organ much too long. His first grandchild, a baby girl was due in three weeks, but he was told that he only had about a week to live. He had accepted that he was going to die.”She now lectures throughout Alabama on behalf of the Alabama Organ Center educating the public on the benefits of organ donation and says, “So I am on a mission, a mission to include the stories of donor families as part of the information available.”

Beautiful, carry on!

Lately, I’ve been thinking about a former co-worker and his family, Mr. Mike Lopez (RIP), he died on March 6, 2006 from a wicked brain tumor, the same variety that took my mother-in-law. The dreaded Glioblastoma Multiforme.

As a family….it will rock your world, and not in a good way. If anything good can be said about this tumor, is that it’s swift.

Now, back to Michael. A good man. Crazy about his wife and kids. A guitar talent. Modest. Funny. A word smith, master of trivia and bad puns. We miss you and our heart go out to Donna and the kids.

Sad to hear that Bradley Delp, lead singer of Boston passed. They were planning to tour this summer, and I’ve always regretted that I didn’t go see them in B-town a couple of years ago.

Dirtsister admires the discipline it takes to sit down and write. This is blather, and it’s an effort to crank it out. I admire the tales of writers and journalists who lugged around or rented typewriters back in the day. Can’t relate to today’s writers who still prefer the typewriter.

Today’s tip: Fill out your donor consent form and save some lives.

Memento Mori

Greetings!

Yesterday’s post regarding death masks and infant mortality was a disturbing topic, but it triggered a memory about my late grandfather’s habit of photographing the corpse at the funeral, he did it with all of our family members and I remember thinking it was odd. My mother may have returned the favor at his funeral but I don’t recall.

Anyway, I wanted to know, where did this bizarre custom come from? I didn’t spend a lot of time on the research, but it looks like the novelty of photography in the 1800’s spurred the trend. For many families it may have been the only photograph of the deceased ever taken.
After viewing some of the poses on the Memento Mori site, I’m delighted that this morbid fad faded away.

No pictures please, move along, there’s nothing to see.

Today’s tip for better living: Turn off the t.v. and go look at the stars.

Speaking of television, I’m guessing that Astronaughty Lisa Nowak is relieved with the wall to wall coverage of Anna Nicole….not one word on Lisa’s crazed antics today.

Generation X Decisions in Death

The February issue of Mortuary Management’s Colleague Wisdom asks funeral directors around the country what the trends are with younger patrons planning funerals.

Generation X’ers are likely to choose cremation for a parent or older adult, but tend to make burial arrangements for a child.

A Colorado funeral home reports that the younger clients associate viewings and funerals with grief, and prefer “celebrations” for remembering over traditional funerals. Service details tend to be more creative, often coordinated by close friends of the family. Visitations include mementos, videos, and photos on display tracing the life of the loved one.

Video tributes tend to by chosen by the younger clients and even though the funeral home may offer that service, often Xrs choose to produce the a video on DVD or Powerpoint presentation themselves. From personal experience, the video tribute is a nice touch and really personalizes the service.

A funeral director in Oregon reports that his younger clients often request an ID viewing of the body before disposition.

Arizona reports that when asked the question, “What do you want for a final tribute?”, the answer is often …they are not sure what they want….but…they DO know what they DON’T want.

We see many of these trends in the Garden, families that come to us a year or two after the passing and decide on an urn and final resting place. It’s not unusual to hear about someone storing their loved one’s ashes in the temporary container on the nightstand beside their bed and then feeling strong enough to make a decision.

Families that choose to scatter the ashes sometimes like to plant a tree or place a memorial stone in the garden. More families are purchasing keepsake items and choosing to keep the ashes in the home as opposed to burial. On a whim, we decided to add a line of jewelry that discreetly holds a tiny amount of ashes or lock of hair and has been hugely popular with families.

It’s a personal choice.

Mr. Urngarden has been instructed to harvest anything of value and pack the rest into a mortar shell for a big fireworks show! Enjoy!

Things to Do Before You Die: Discourage all things that come in gray.