Life in the Garden

Matters of Life and Death

DIY memorial keepsakes

Mourning Pins: A One-of-a-Kind DIY Memorial Keepsake

memorial pins diy

Today, it’s back to the Victorians, for a look at mourning pins, a charming tradition in a fascinating collection of memento mori created during this time. And then we’re going to put a modern twist on the idea, inspired by a February Curbly post.

My thinking is this: it could be both a healing, mentally-engaging, activity. At some point in your bereavement, your loved one’s mourning pin then becomes a DIY memorial keepsake which can be worn on the anniversary of their passing.

What is a Mourning Pin?

A mourning pin is a brooch, worn to signify a person’s status as a bereaved mourner. Part of a wide-spectrum of mourning jewelry, back then, memorial pins were usually made of black enamel, but changing the color of the enamel (white for unmarried, virginal woman, for example) or changing the type of precious stone (pearls for children) used in the design added deeper symbolic meaning.

memento mori mourning pin

Also, different colors were used to signify the stage of mourning the wearer was in. Someone strictly adhering to the Victorian mourning process, would wear some type of mourning jewelry during the funeral, and then for the prescribed period of deep mourning (2-3 years, depending upon the kinship status between you and the deceased). After a time, photographs were incorporated into the design of mourning jewelry, and mourning pins in particular (Source).

How to Make a DIY Mourning Pin

Certainly, you can buy mourning pins online; I’ve even found them on Etsy and Ebay. But, if you’re one of those people who enjoy arts and crafts, making your very own mourning pin, a wonderful memorial keepsake, could be a fine DIY project in the early days after the death of a loved one.

Supplies You’ll Need

In addition to a design template (an oval, rectangle, or circle, maybe even a heart) you’ll need the following supplies to complete this memorial craft project:

  • shrink paper
  • clutch-back pins
  • high-quality acrylic paints
  • fine point paint brushes
  • a pen or marker
  • hot glue and glue gun
  • a cookie sheet lined with aluminum foil

If you’re planning to affix ‘jewels’ to your mourning pin, you’ll also need those. Here’s a tutorial video which inspired this DIY memorial keepsake idea. The focus there is on Valentine’s Day – rather appropriate to this act of love, don’t you think? This idea could easily be adapted for a mourning pin.

Here’s another idea that doesn’t require the shrink paper or baking to make tumbler pins that you could adapt to a memorial theme. This might be a good activity to help your kids channel their creativity to create something both beautiful and meaningful during a dark time.

Once your finished, you’ll have a beautiful, meaningful memorial pin that can help you and everyone around you remember those you’ve lose.

Learn More About Victorian History

It’s said the Victorians perfected the art of mourning, In fact, much of what we do around death started with them. For that fact alone, Victorians fascinate me. (You may have noticed Victorian society is a common topical thread running through September’s posts. It began with “Celebrity Cremation: Albert Einstein”. Certainly, having been born in 1879, in the later years of Victoria’s reign (1822-1901) we can add his name to any list of prominent Victorians – although he doesn’t fit our image of a Victorian fellow.

The thread remains in Beauty from the Ashes: Blue Cremation Urns, where I mention a leading Victorian woman, who chose to be cremated upon her death in 1927. Do you remember who she was? I’m referring to Victoria Woodhull, the very first woman to run for president. (She was a candidate in 1872, nominated by the Equal Rights Party, which supported women’s suffrage and equal rights. You’ll never guess who her running mate was: Black abolitionist leader Frederick Douglass. The very idea makes me proud to be an American woman, despite the fact I have few political aspirations.

And how the Victorians handled the advent of cremation was the focus of a fourth post, History of Cremation: Victorian Society’s Reaction.  If you would like to discover more about the Victorians: read Victoria Magazine’s online article, “House of Mourning – Victorian Mourning & Funeral Customs in the 1890s.”

DIY Memorial Keepsakes: How to Make a Funeral Program

Funeral program template
Source: Elegant Memorials

If you’ve been to a funeral or memorial service, chances are you were given a funeral program upon your arrival at the service location–so you’re familiar with this traditional addition. But, if you’ve never seen one for yourself; a funeral program is a multi-page printed booklet provided to each guest at a funeral or memorial service. In this post, I’d like to share some ideas for creating a truly personal funeral program in honor of a loved one. Actually, it’s one fundamental idea: your loved one’s funeral program can rise above the commonplace.

What Makes an Extraordinary Funeral Program?
Commonly, a funeral program simply includes the relevant details of the individual’s life, the order of service (who will be speaking, what scripture readings will be shared, or prayers collectively recited), and a photograph of the deceased. It may also feature a favored scriptural passage or prayer. Honestly, I’ve never felt compelled to keep any of these ‘ordinary’ funeral programs – beyond the photographic portrait of the deceased on the cover; there was no ‘emotive’ quality to any of them. In fairly short order, each ended up in the paper recycling bin.

Taking the time to take an ordinary funeral program ‘to the next level’ can turn it into a truly meaningful DIY memorial keepsake, which will be treasured by service guests. Think of it as a gift which allows them to reconnect with the spirit and individuality of their deceased loved one in the future. A funeral program transformed into such a memorial keepsake would feature candid photographs and a biography of the deceased – along with some thoughtful extras.

Who Remembers the T.V. show, “This is Your Life”?
Okay, so I’m dating myself; the show ran on television from 1952 to 1987 – but began on radio in 1946. The title aptly describes the show’s premise: each episode is a review of the life of ‘someone worth knowing’. If you’re curious about the dozens of other guests, view the Classic TV episode list. if you’d like to watch an episode or two, take a look at the Mental Floss online article “5 Must-See Episodes of This is Your Life”.

What does this have to do with making a funeral program? It might help you to think of the project as writing an episode honoring your loved one. Ask yourself, “What does the audience need to know about this individual to better appreciate their legacy?”

Naturally, this requires a little more thought on your part, and maybe the help of family and friends. They can gather photographs and otherwise assist you in putting together this commemorative keepsake.

The task of writing the biographical part of the funeral program can be done in tandem with writing your loved one’s obituary. For guidance, see our April 2018 post, “Four Tips for Writing an Obituary”.

What extras can you add to a funeral program to make it a testament to the life being commemorated? Turn to what you know about them: for example, if he or she loved to cook, you could include one of their favorite recipes, coupled with photographs of them in the kitchen. If known for their wit or sense of humor, it could be an often told joke or commonly- told truism.

Here’s a thought: put the order of service on a separate sheet of paper, to be included as an insert. This gives you the ‘space’ to make a funeral program which is focused solely on your loved one’s life and legacy. No one will want to throw that into the bin – they’ll keep it close at hand to help them through the darker moments of bereavement.

Where to Begin
If you’re a wizard with your chosen word processing program, there’s no doubt you can create a funeral program using one of the brochure or booklet templates provided. For most people, even on a good day, the task would be daunting. And the days following the death of a loved one are by no means, ‘good’ days. Grief is, by its very nature, a detriment to focused attention (that’s another reason why it’s good to ask for help).

Fortunately, many websites offer free funeral program templates, such as Canva, and Template.net. While ‘free’ is nice; when it comes to designing a funeral program worthy of becoming a DIY memorial keepsake, you may want to look at premium funeral program templates. You can find them at the earlier mentioned Templates.net, at Elegant Memorials , even on Etsy The cost ranges from less than $10 to around $30.00.

When looking for the perfect template, consider using a favorite color, flower, or landscape. If he or she was religious, the funeral program can feature relevant artwork or religious iconography. Also, don’t forget to think about the thickness of the paper you want to use in the printing of your loved one’s funeral booklet, as it’s a critical factor in creating a keepsake-worthy funeral program.

Closing with Wise, Inspiring Words
I want to leave you with this thought, from Polish writer and poet, Czes?aw Mi?osz: “The living owe it to those who no longer can speak to tell their story for them.”  I believe this is true. Fortunately, it’s a debt which can be paid, at least in part, by learning how to make a funeral program which tells your loved one’s story with unique insight.