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You are here: Home / Confessions / Funeral Directors Have a Problem

Funeral Directors Have a Problem

July 23, 2007 urngarden.com

Urngarden goes to the lake

Funeral directors have a problem? Maybe you prefer the word “challenge”. The Boomers are breaking tradition. When the average burial is $5000 minimum, and the average price for cremation is $2500, and you’re a funeral director…..you’ve got a situation.

We collect articles on creative memorial services. Here’s one we’ve been sitting on. Thanks to CK for sharing. Our sympathies to her family on the loss of her mother.

After we discontinued life support on Sunday we committed to something that I share with you: while it would be a hard week it didn’t have to be a “bad” week. After all, we were honoring and mourning a person that impacted us in defining, advancing ways. We had no unresolved issues or regrets and told our silly, smart and sweet momma how much we loved her all the time. Geez, I even have a darn theme song for the woman and my sister has a pet name for her. We are, as weird as it sounds, fortunate to be left with such gaping holes in our hearts.

One glitch, though…a ‘funeral’ with sad songs and sad people did not align with our mom’s spirit. It was wholly counterintuitive to the woman we were honoring. It was just plain wrong. And Guntersville totally supported our every wish and whim.

So we held a “Celebration of Life” ceremony and “after party.” Yep, mid-week my sister and I pulled ourselves together, put the kleenex down, trashed the the jeans and t-shirts we’d been wearing for days, scrubbed-up, dolled-up and did right by our momma. I even pulled out the pearls.

There was no funeral home. There was a nice sanctuary and then a great big room with big speakers, food and lots of sunlight. There was no sorrowful music. There was mom’s favorite music of Johnny Cash, Willie Nelson, Van Morrison and many more. There wasn’t talk of regrets, there were funny stories. And, of course, the Pastor was a rockin’ female (you go girl!).

My sister, who has never looked more beautiful and has never made me more proud gave a moving eulogy. She’ll never know how much she radiated, but mom does. My eulogy was a bit spirited as I used some fun props to weave together the story of mom’s myriad, amazing attributes. Oh, and we gave out custom-made CDs of her favorite songs along with her favorite candy (she was a sugar junkie and loved Kit Kat bars). I did ask attendees not to eat in church.

So everyone left with good stories, good food and goodies. As the photos prove, we had MUCH more laughing than crying. Mission accomplished, momma.

We’ve addressed this before, and I’m just sayin’ ….DIY could do an episode on Creative Memorials.

Oprah has.

Complication? Regarding the distribution of the CD’s there is probably some copyright and licensing issue. Seems there always is…..

Filed Under: Confessions

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Comments

  1. Deidre Blair says

    July 27, 2007 at 9:27 AM

    I have enjoyed spending time on your blog and reading your entries. I am the new kid on the block, but thought you would enjoy reading my memorial service that I had for my husband. You can read it on my blog entry “the best memorial I ever planned”. Thank you for sharing all your wonderful advise.

Trackbacks

  1. Momma Tree in NYC at Life in the Garden says:
    October 8, 2007 at 7:07 PM

    […] Special thanks to CK, who has publicly shared her journey of the loss of her sweet momma. Thanks to the boundless grace of many bloggers, my mother is now commemorated and honored in New York City with her own tree (for those new to my blog, my mother died suddenly 8 weeks ago–a tribute with pictures of her is here). But it’s more than a tree. It’s a sanctuary. More than that, the tree has been planted in a park in Spanish Harlem which is in a part of the city that is a “BID” (Business Improvement District). So this beautiful act betters a community…which makes a whole lotta sense since the beauty of this community’s moving act betters me. […]

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