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funeral food

Comfort Food Can Get You through Rough Times (Including the Holidays)

November 9, 2017 Kim Stacey

fried chicken cake
Credit: DariusCooks

If you’re dreading the holidays, this could be the perfect time to fix and eat some comfort food. There’s no real need to define the phrase: we all know what it means to us personally. David Tanis commented on the very individual nature of comfort foods in, A Platter of Figs and Other Recipes:

“What a strange idea: “comfort food.” Isn’t every food comforting in its own way! Why are certain foods disqualified? Can’t fancy food be soothing in the same way as granny food?” Must it always be about loaded memories, like Proust’s Madeleine? Or can it be merely quirky, like M. F. K. Fisher’s tangerine ritual: she dried them on a radiator, then cooled them on her Paris windowsill. Comfort food—food that reassures—is different things to different people.” ~ David Tanis, A Platter of Figs and Other Recipes (Source)

Comfort food doesn’t just nourish our bodies, it fosters emotional well-being. It’s “nostalgic or sentimental value” is complemented by its high caloric content. (Source)

grilled cheese sandwich
image: Druffs

I wonder if anyone things of non-fat yogurt as comfort food? I highly doubt it. For me, it’s a big pile of mashed potatoes with butter, salt and pepper. My mother thought a bowl full of crumbled saltines covered in milk was the panacea for sorrow. When asked, a neighbor of mine was quick to say “grilled cheese sandwiches”. (But not just any grilled cheese would do – it had to be yellow American cheese on soft, squishy, white bread–just like she ate as a kid).

It’s not surprising comfort food is a good thing to serve at funerals and memorial services (occasions when everyone could use some tender loving care, not just in the form of hugs and condolences), but in food.

You may remember this was the topic of a 2013 Urn Garden post, “Not Sure What to Say at the Funeral? Make a Meal”:

jello mold

“And then there’s funerals. I may not remember the songs that were played or even where the services were held, but I do recall the food that guests brought to the family house before the service and the reception following it. If you’re like most, you know that casseroles, macaroni and cheese, Jell-O molds and lasagna was –and still are– pretty popular.”

Today, the internet is fat with recipes of classic comfort foods that families now refer to as “funeral food”. Potatoes, cakes, and casseroles that melt in your mouth and will feed a houseful of guests.

So, what’s your idea of comfort food?

funeral potatoes
Image: Genius Kitchen

If you’re drawing a blank, don’t be dismayed. Just think back to your childhood – chances are good something will pop-up. (One person I asked thought of McDonald’s hamburgers and fries as comfort food. For his wife, it was oatmeal with brown sugar. Your comfort food could be anything–as long as it meets just one criterion: eating it relieves you of stress and helps to make you genuinely happy.

Nothing coming to mind? Maybe jog your memory – or get inspired–by looking around online.

So many comfort food recipes can be found in articles like “101 Best Comfort Food Classics” and “The 144 Most Delish Comfort Foods”, and “The Pioneer Woman’s Best Comfort Food Recipes”.

One last link, and then I’ll go. Just this month, on November 5th, 2017, the Register~Herald posted “Giving meaning to comfort food”, where the author, Michelle James, wrote of the therapeutic value of food in one woman’s life–a time of deep grief – and how she was eventually drawn to write a cookbook featuring “her own (recipes), her mother’s, her grandmother’s, friends’, co-workers’, neighbors’. Some were clipped and some just handed down from someone else.” I’m sure compiling recipes–in and of itself a loving act–was comforting to her, as was reliving the memories of sharing these comfort foods with family.

One last thing, and then I’ll go. It’s a quote from Eli Brown’s Cinnamon and Gunpowder: “Some foods are so comforting, so nourishing of body and soul, that to eat them is to be home again after a long journey.” (Source) I think he’s got something there, but I’ll take it one step further. It’s not just about going home after a long journey; it’s about feeling welcome when you arrive.

Filed Under: Confessions Tagged With: comfort food, funeral food

Not Sure What To Say At The Funeral? Make a Meal.

March 27, 2013 urngarden.com

funeral cakeGrowing up, no matter what the special occasion, I always remembered amazing food being served. Birthdays had delicious homemade cakes, and holidays had succulent and tasty dinners.

And then there’s funerals. I may not remember the songs that were played or even where the services were held, but I do recall the food that guests brought to the family house before the service and the reception following it. If you’re like most, you know that casseroles, macaroni and cheese, Jell-O molds and lasagna was –and still are– pretty popular.

The tradition of feasting and funerals date as far back as the concept of funerals themselves. (The Lord’s Supper is a good example of this though it was held before Christ’s death). Over time, food became a mainstay at funerals, with guests bringing a multitude of dishes as offerings to the person who died. This tradition still holds true today.

Italian families generally bring large portions of food to deceased family’s home as soon as the word gets out that somebody died. Jewish households follow the tradition of Seudat Havra-ah, also known as a meal of condolence or recovery, and is the first meal eaten by mourners following a loved one’s funeral.

Funeral food is comforting, to make and to eat and classic dishes like funeral potatoes and cassaroles are easy to serve up and nibble on or freeze if needed.

Mourners tend to skip meals because they are too grief-stricken and busy to spend the time preparing food. Some bereaved family members and friends also prefer to drown their sorrows in preparing meals for the immediate family. Since many people don’t know what to say or do when a person dies, taking a meal often fills this void.

Another option to express sympathy is a gift basket full of comforting teas, breakfast food, or snacks.

Today’s Internet age also allows families and friends to sign-up for funeral food. Sites such as Take Them A Meal and Meal Train let users sign up online to bring a meal at a specific date and time.

Image source:  BuzzFeed

Filed Under: Confessions, Memorial Service Ideas Tagged With: funeral cake, funeral food, funeral traditions

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