• Skip to secondary menu
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar
  • Urn Garden Home
  • About

Life in the Garden

Matters of Life and Death

  • Blog Home
  • Confessions
  • Featured Products
  • Memorial Service Ideas
  • Pets
You are here: Home / Confessions / What NOT to Say When a Death Occurs

What NOT to Say When a Death Occurs

April 4, 2013 urngarden.com

When someone you know loses a loved one, it’s not uncommon to be at a loss for words. Death in today’s society is still uncomfortable for many to talk about and is even considered inappropriate to some. However, if you are looking to comfort a grieving friend or relative, look within your heart because the answers are right there. Don’t try to cheer up a bereaved person, but focus on expressing compassion for his or her loss.

It’s easy to find a few words to express sympathy, but even easier to say the wrong thing without thinking. For starters, forget clichés or platitudes, as those don’t only sound insincere, but at times, pretentious or unsympathetic. Avoid phrases such as:

* She or he is in a better place

* I know how you feel

* Time heals all wounds

* It’s time to move on

* He or she is no longer suffering

* You have a beautiful angel in Heaven

* Don’t cry; he or she is now your guardian angel

* You will get over it and find love again (or have another child, etc)

Now, that you know what not to say, it shouldn’t be too difficult to find the right words. With a little thought, you can comfort a grieving friend or relative without the fear of saying the wrong thing. Some of the correct phrases to use include:

* I’m sorry

* Your loved one will be missed dearly

* Blessings

* What can I do for you?

* Your family is in my thoughts and prayers

* You have my sympathy

* Don’t worry about (fill in the blank); I will help where I can

* I care about (or love) you

If you are still uneasy about saying something inappropriate, consider  putting your thoughts down on paper. A short note or letter or even a preprinted card is acceptable in these situations. If you lost a loved one, what was something someone said that was comforting?

Filed Under: Confessions, Memorial Service Ideas Tagged With: comforting words at a funeral, what not to say at a funeral, what not to say when a death occurs, words of sympathy

Primary Sidebar

See More Memorial Ideas

cremation urns

At Urn Garden, we have experience working with families as they experience the loss of a loved one. Our hope is that the articles and resources below will help make this process just a little easier.

If you’re looking to purchase a cremation urn, feel free to browse our collection, which includes keepsake urns, urns for pets, cremation jewelry, and more.

If there’s anything we can help you with, feel free to contact us or give us a call at 1-888-876-1467.

Recent Posts

  • Kiss My Ash Cremation Urn Collection-Some of Our Craziest Engraved Urns
  • Planning a Funeral for a Suicide
  • What you need to know about buying an urn online
  • Death with Dignity
  • Cremation & Religion: What Religions Believe in Cremation?

Pages

  • About Us

Death in the Digital Age

  • Beyond Indigo Grief Forum
  • Find A Grave
  • Seven Ponds
  • Talking to Children About Death
  • The Daily Undertaker

Copyright © 2023 Urn Garden · Log in